This love challenge is NOT as easy as I assumed.
All I'm going to say is when you focus on love, your patience is tested.
But I'm holding in there... and learning much.
~God Bless~
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
|| the 2 week REAL love challenge ||
The Bible is an awesome tool in living life and measuring your standard of living. The New Testament especially does it for me. The life and teachings of Jesus Christ create the true guideline for believers and their walk in this world.
In fact, Jesus came and totally struck out the former 10 commandments of the old law (known as the Torah; the first five books of the Bible) and replaced them with two simple commandments that if followed, would ensure we never broke the original commandments:
36 "Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" 37 Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Matthew 22:36-40
Let's focus on each of these commandments and why they are important and how to impart them into our daily life. Beginning with the second of these:
In fact, Jesus came and totally struck out the former 10 commandments of the old law (known as the Torah; the first five books of the Bible) and replaced them with two simple commandments that if followed, would ensure we never broke the original commandments:
36 "Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" 37 Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Matthew 22:36-40
Let's focus on each of these commandments and why they are important and how to impart them into our daily life. Beginning with the second of these:
Love your neighbor as yourself...
Love. That word. The possibilities of what it means. The fallacies with the world’s definition of such; I want to take a moment and speak to the minds of the ‘romantics’ and the overly imaginative bunch.
Love is NOT butterflies. It is NOT sweaty palms. It is NOT sexual arousal. It is NOT adrenaline-induced highs. It is in NO WAY the ending, middle or beginning of a Disney Fairytale. No. I’m sorry to be the bearer of truth, but Love is none of the above. That, my friend… is infatuation. But the beauty of living as a believer, one who lives life by the standard of God’s word is he has TAUGHT us the true characteristics of Love.
The important thing to know is that there are different levels and types of Love:
1) Eros Love - known as "erotic love". It is based on strong feelings toward another. It usually occurs in the first stages of a man-woman "romantic" relationship. :Physical:
2) Philos Love- a love based on friendship between two people. :Mental:
2) Philos Love- a love based on friendship between two people. :Mental:
3) Agape Love- unconditional love in essence, the most perfect type of love. :Spiritual:
Now, true Love does not only belong to your boyfriend, family, best friends, and favorite shoe salesman, etc. it goes to all of your neighbors. all. Yes. I know. Even the woman who cuts you off EVERY morning as you drive your regular route to work, even the neighborhood children who steal your roses and their mother who apathetically denies their wrong doing.
You may think that by NOT cursing at the aggressive driver or not spanking the wayward children and smacking the... sense into the mother- that you are acting in Love. But I challenge you… can you compare your interactions with the world to the biblical definition of agape Love?
“4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7
Coincidentally this breaks down into 14 different characteristics of agape Love. The way God Loves us....
- Patient
- Kind
- Unresentful
- Modest
- Humble
- Respectful
- Selfless
- Calm
- Forgiving
- Seeks Good, Not Evil
- Protecting
- Trusting
- Hopeful
- Perseverant
I am going to start this next week with 14 days of real Love. Each day will have a specific area of love to focus on. Monday December 1st, will begin with Patience. Showing patience to all around me is truly displaying the Love of God.
The key here is remembering, it's not ME who is able to Love perfectly, but Jesus Christ in ME who Loves me so very perfectly and unconditionally.
I cant wait to see the fruits of my Love labor….
God is Love....
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
CO-OP | counting on other people
The theory of ‘co-op’ when applied to real estate means exactly what it hints: co-operation. You, along with several others own a share of your apartment building, including the space you live in. You share the costs of building maintenance and overhead charges and absorb unexpected costs as well. In essence, if your ‘condo’ is ‘co-op’ it’s… shared.
So how does this play into everyday life?
The lifestyle of a believer calls that we all be accountable for one another.
Proverbs 27:17 states that: "Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another."
NOT that we judge one another...
Matthew 7:1 "Do not judge, or you too will be judged."
How confusing ... right?
Wrong. God is calling for us to be Co-ops in Christ! Think about... co-operate with one another.
Accountability comes in the forms of:
- Encouragement
- Moral Support
- Rememberance of the Word
Judgement comes in the forms of:
- Critique
- Condemnment
- Blame
How many times have you felt Judged by your peers? Were they attempting to ENCOURAGE you? SUPPORT you? bring the word to your REMEMBERANCE? or did they BLAME you for what was happening? CONDEMN your actions and CRITIQUE what you should do?
Think about this the next time you offer to keep someone accountable. Accountability can not be clouded by your own personal feelings, but guided only by the word of God. Offer support and only offer solutions if asked. But ALWAYS, ALWAYS, offer the word of God.
Monday, October 20, 2008
people have a natural desire and tendency to look for 'scape goats' when trouble finds them. or they fall into temptation.
"man, look at the devil trying to work!"
"he/she KNOWS I'm trying to stay away from [insert sin here] and they gonna invite me over with all this going on?!"
"man, look at the devil trying to work!"
"he/she KNOWS I'm trying to stay away from [insert sin here] and they gonna invite me over with all this going on?!"
"The soul that sinneth, it shall die. The son shall not bear the iniquity of the father, neither shall the father bear the iniquity of the son: the righteousness of the righteous shall be upon him, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon him." Ezekial 18:20
Our walk with Christ is no one's responsibility but our OWN. as Christians we have to hold ourselves accountable for every mistake, every bad choice, every ill advised decision. BECAUSE we are...
FREE MORAL AGENTS!!
John 5:40 "But you are not willing to come to Me that you may have life."
Our God is a god of mercy. He gave us a CHOICE that we should choose to have life and have it more abundantly by following his word. How awesome a revelation to know that once we find the Lord, we are THEN given the power over sin. We don’t even have to do it anymore!
“Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.” James 4:17
Once we have been called to accept Christ... we are free from ANY and all sin. We are free from all of our past. Repentance wipes the slate clean. We look at ourselves more judgementally than our Father in Heaven, who has called us all by name.
John 8:24 "Therefore I said to you that you will die in your sins; for if you do not believe that I am [He], you will die in your sins."
God gives us the choice to believe that Jesus Christ came to die for our sins and save us from destruction. If we believe that, we are saved from.... (hate to be so blunt but-) damnation and a life of TROUBLE.
I leave you with this....
"29 Yet says the house of Israel, The way of the Lord is not fair and just! O house of Israel, are not My ways fair and just? Are not your ways unfair and unjust?
30 Therefore I will judge you, O house of Israel, every one according to his ways, says the Lord God. Repent and turn from all your transgressions, lest iniquity be your ruin and so shall they not be a stumbling block to you.
31 Cast away from you all your transgressions by which you have transgressed against Me, and make you a new mind and heart and a new spirit. For why will you die, O house of Israel??
32 For I have no pleasure in the death of him who dies, says the Lord God. Therefore turn (be converted) and live!" Ezekial 18:29-32 (Amplified version in effect- for your wake up call)
***edited to add***
One of my friends wrote me this morning [randomly] and sent me the verse below:
"Jesus said to him, No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back [to the things behind] is fit for the kingdom of God.." Luke 9:62 (Amplified)
HOW APPROPRIATE?!
Friday, October 17, 2008
ALWAYS A WAY OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1 Corinthians 10:13 (KJV)
"There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it."
1 Corinthians 10:13 (The Amplified Bible)
"For no temptation (no trial regarded as enticing to sin), [no matter how it comes or where it leads] has overtaken you and laid hold on you that is not common to man [that is, no temptation or trial has come to you that is beyond human resistance and that is not adjusted and adapted and belonging to human experience, and such as man can bear]. But God is faithful [to His Word and to His compassionate nature], and He [can be trusted] not to let you be tempted and tried and assayed beyond your ability and strength of resistance and power to endure, but with the temptation He will [always] also provide the way out (the means of escape to a landing place), that you may be capable and strong and powerful to bear up under it patiently."
I'm not sure of everyone Else's experience in life. But I CAN attest to this.
Isn't it awesome to sit and think about how God can keep us and deliver us in the midst of EVERYTHING. Therefore there is no temptation, not ONE that can oppress us and take over us. We have the victory through Christ to overcome ANYTHING!
“…. We are more than conquers through Him that loved us.” (Romans 8:37)
“I can do all things through Christ who strengths me” (Philippians 4:13)
Looking back over the course of my life, I have suffered much temptation. I have been tempted to the peak of all temptation in numerous areas but, because I wasn't aware of my RIGHT through the covenant of Blood with Jesus Christ, I never noticed the way out! Either I ignored it or God allowed it to happen so ORGANICALLY that I only notice now that I look back.
The dramatic end of a relationship, no matter how painful- may be God's way of saying GET OUT! For me it was.
Spending so much time walking outside of the will of God, especially after I had already declared that I believed He died on the cross for me was DANGEROUS. When I decided to become saved (which was at a VERY VERY early age) God took ownership of my life. From that point forward, what I did, was not to be my own decision. So God had to allow things around me to be SHAKEN up to allow me to see, "hey. you're really outside of Gods will right now. you need to find a way back in!"
I lost friends. I lost my home.
but one thing I haven't lost, is my mind or my peace! “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give unto you…” (John 14:27).
The way God provides out may NOT always be your idea of great. But when you allow yourself to step outside of His will, you have to understand that CONSEQUENCE follows ALL action! JUST because you are saved, does not give you a RIGHT to sin and ask for forgiveness.
NO!
Being saved gives you the right NOT to sin. :-)
So the way out God may provide may be a simultaneous chastening. It definitely was for me. God had to come in and purge my life in a major way, because I couldn't do it alone!
He always gives us a way out. I believe they start off easy, but get progressively harder as we continue in our own will. Its like walking down a path into a deep forest, as you're going down this path (which by the way is not the path that your tour guide, God has likened for u) as you're going down, you slide down some hills and stumble over some rocks, but it's nothing major. You're thinking, 'I don't know what God was talking about, I'm doing just fine on this path!' Little do you know, the path leads to nowhere- only destruction. Along the way in the beginning of your journey, before you slide down hill #1, there is a small sign pointing to a path that says "exit now to path, right." you smirk and enjoy your slide down the hill. what fun! As you approach another hill you notice that there is a wounded animal on the side of the path. You stop to look at it and see yet another sign telling you to exit here for the right path. This goes on and on and on! The path gets HARDER. it gets DARKER and you lose your way. Finding those little exits to the right path become harder and harder. They are across gorges, surrounded by vicious animals, in coves, hidden high in trees- anything to make you realize. WOW. if I'd taken the way out God offered in the BEGINNING... I'd be much better off right now.
How long will you wait before YOU exit?
Take it from me. You don't want to wait for punishment.
"There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it."
1 Corinthians 10:13 (The Amplified Bible)
"For no temptation (no trial regarded as enticing to sin), [no matter how it comes or where it leads] has overtaken you and laid hold on you that is not common to man [that is, no temptation or trial has come to you that is beyond human resistance and that is not adjusted and adapted and belonging to human experience, and such as man can bear]. But God is faithful [to His Word and to His compassionate nature], and He [can be trusted] not to let you be tempted and tried and assayed beyond your ability and strength of resistance and power to endure, but with the temptation He will [always] also provide the way out (the means of escape to a landing place), that you may be capable and strong and powerful to bear up under it patiently."
I'm not sure of everyone Else's experience in life. But I CAN attest to this.
Isn't it awesome to sit and think about how God can keep us and deliver us in the midst of EVERYTHING. Therefore there is no temptation, not ONE that can oppress us and take over us. We have the victory through Christ to overcome ANYTHING!
“…. We are more than conquers through Him that loved us.” (Romans 8:37)
“I can do all things through Christ who strengths me” (Philippians 4:13)
Looking back over the course of my life, I have suffered much temptation. I have been tempted to the peak of all temptation in numerous areas but, because I wasn't aware of my RIGHT through the covenant of Blood with Jesus Christ, I never noticed the way out! Either I ignored it or God allowed it to happen so ORGANICALLY that I only notice now that I look back.
The dramatic end of a relationship, no matter how painful- may be God's way of saying GET OUT! For me it was.
Spending so much time walking outside of the will of God, especially after I had already declared that I believed He died on the cross for me was DANGEROUS. When I decided to become saved (which was at a VERY VERY early age) God took ownership of my life. From that point forward, what I did, was not to be my own decision. So God had to allow things around me to be SHAKEN up to allow me to see, "hey. you're really outside of Gods will right now. you need to find a way back in!"
I lost friends. I lost my home.
but one thing I haven't lost, is my mind or my peace! “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give unto you…” (John 14:27).
The way God provides out may NOT always be your idea of great. But when you allow yourself to step outside of His will, you have to understand that CONSEQUENCE follows ALL action! JUST because you are saved, does not give you a RIGHT to sin and ask for forgiveness.
NO!
Being saved gives you the right NOT to sin. :-)
So the way out God may provide may be a simultaneous chastening. It definitely was for me. God had to come in and purge my life in a major way, because I couldn't do it alone!
He always gives us a way out. I believe they start off easy, but get progressively harder as we continue in our own will. Its like walking down a path into a deep forest, as you're going down this path (which by the way is not the path that your tour guide, God has likened for u) as you're going down, you slide down some hills and stumble over some rocks, but it's nothing major. You're thinking, 'I don't know what God was talking about, I'm doing just fine on this path!' Little do you know, the path leads to nowhere- only destruction. Along the way in the beginning of your journey, before you slide down hill #1, there is a small sign pointing to a path that says "exit now to path, right." you smirk and enjoy your slide down the hill. what fun! As you approach another hill you notice that there is a wounded animal on the side of the path. You stop to look at it and see yet another sign telling you to exit here for the right path. This goes on and on and on! The path gets HARDER. it gets DARKER and you lose your way. Finding those little exits to the right path become harder and harder. They are across gorges, surrounded by vicious animals, in coves, hidden high in trees- anything to make you realize. WOW. if I'd taken the way out God offered in the BEGINNING... I'd be much better off right now.
How long will you wait before YOU exit?
Take it from me. You don't want to wait for punishment.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Holding Fast...
Matthew 6:25 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?"
Easier said than done it seems right?
Today as I fast for Hear the Word Bible Church, I also fast for my family, my friends and myself. I am asking God to reveal His greater purpose in our lives and show up- and SHOW OUT.
I'm so excited about what God has in store for my family. We are all coming together out of NOWHERE it seems. All that praying my grandmother did is finally paying off and I thank the Lord she is around to see it. Thanksgiving is going to be wonderful, all 40 of us, in one house for 4 days. hahah! Let me add that to my prayer list.
The call is going out for Christians everywhere to STAND UP and be accounted for. The world settles deeper and deeper into destruction EVERYDAY and we have to stand in the gap... may seem crazy to everyone else but the word lets us know that will be so!
"18For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. 19For it is written:
"I will destroy the wisdom of the wise;
the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate."
1 Corinthians 1: 18-19
It is NOT easy. But Creflo Dollar preached on this very thing and said something very easy to understand but extremely profound. When you focus on what you are NOT supposed to do as a Christian, you are giving your attention to the negative. Instead, focus on what you CAN do as a Christian and get yourself involved!
Easier said than done it seems right?
Today as I fast for Hear the Word Bible Church, I also fast for my family, my friends and myself. I am asking God to reveal His greater purpose in our lives and show up- and SHOW OUT.
I'm so excited about what God has in store for my family. We are all coming together out of NOWHERE it seems. All that praying my grandmother did is finally paying off and I thank the Lord she is around to see it. Thanksgiving is going to be wonderful, all 40 of us, in one house for 4 days. hahah! Let me add that to my prayer list.
The call is going out for Christians everywhere to STAND UP and be accounted for. The world settles deeper and deeper into destruction EVERYDAY and we have to stand in the gap... may seem crazy to everyone else but the word lets us know that will be so!
"18For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. 19For it is written:
"I will destroy the wisdom of the wise;
the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate."
1 Corinthians 1: 18-19
It is NOT easy. But Creflo Dollar preached on this very thing and said something very easy to understand but extremely profound. When you focus on what you are NOT supposed to do as a Christian, you are giving your attention to the negative. Instead, focus on what you CAN do as a Christian and get yourself involved!
Monday, October 13, 2008
Connection or Camoflouge?
How many women have you heard say, "I'm not like most girls. I'm very different. I don't look at sex as an emotional thing. I relate more to men when it comes to relationships, sex and dating.", etc.
I am not judging, believe me. Because I have been that girl. I have NEVER been one to assume or expect that because I have engaged in sexual activity with someone that love, a second date, or even a phone call should follow. Many times, I have played the heartbreaker. Engaging in one night, a few nights or a few weeks of casual and temperal pleasure; only to shut down any attempts by the other party to further the relationship beyond merely sex.
When the issues of, "Maybe we should get to know each other better (non sexually)" begin to arise, I haul tail! I'm being very transperent here.
I HAVE been that girl, with a million reasons why I'm not interested in moving past the casualty of fornication/adultery/pseudo-friendship. Claiming, "I'm like you! [to a man] I'm not really all emotional, I don't get women who get all wrapped up in sex and guys and they're in love after one night or just a few dates." Quote me. I've said it before believe me, it was probably a little harsher when said in real time. [ Hind's sight is 20/20, but that's neither here nor there ]
Anyway, this whole concept got me to thinking about the many women who claim to relate or connect to men in that sense.... I look at a woman's body and sexuality as being created to be submissive. Our sex is created to RECEIVE. Our reproductive system is created to NURTURE. Therefore, God must have equipped us as women with the natural patience, virtue and emotions necessary to be so SUBMISSIVE to both a MAN and a CHILD; on top of being submissive to GOD!
".... giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel..."1 Peter 3:7 (King James)
"....thy love to me was wonderful, passing the love of women." 2 Samuel 1:26 (King James)
and 1 Corinthians 11:8-9 (King James Version) "For the man is not of the woman: but the woman of the man. 9Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man."
First let me talk about why I found these scriptures very relatable.
1 Peter 3:7
In this scripture, women are acknowledged as being the 'weaker vessel'. Mainly in a physical sense, but I believe that when writing this letter Peter was also acknowledging the emotional tenderness of a woman in comparison to her male counterpart. Emotions are displays of the flesh. Therefore they hold relation to and are under the subjection of our vessels [flesh]. Further reading of the verse goes on to tell the husband to acknowledge that we are weaker vessels but equals in life.
2 Samuel 1:26
In this scripture David is in mourning for Saul and Johnathan. He writes that Johnathans love for him was great, surpassing even the love of women. I believe this again shows how the emotions of women are generally more intense and stronger than men. David was astounded and touched by the brotherly love they shared because the fact was this man showed him love deeply and truly the way women are known to love.
LASTLY,
1 Corinthians 11:8-9
Women were created FOR men. This is also evident in the story of the creation. Above all else women feel a need to be connected to men in some way deeper than men feel the need to be connected to us. It is the universal God given "purpose" of a woman. To be the help meet for a man. Just as man [humankind] is created with the purpose of worshipping and glorifying God.
DONT GET ME WRONG! I am not saying that God has placed us ALL here to be married and have husbands. I do NOT believe that is true, but what I am saying is due to the nature and reason of our creation, we tend to naturally desire what we were originally purposed for.
I say all this to say, what if our attempts to 'relate to' or 'connect with' men in regards to sexuality and emotions in relationships, supress a fear of disappointment, abandonment, rejection...etc? We deep inside long for the emotional love and long term commitment from a man, but have noticed how men can seemingly avoid heartbreak much easier than ourselves. Therefore in a self preservation attempt, we mimic (to be an imitation of; simulate; resemble closely. ) their aloofness, their casualty, there give love to get sex personas. Eventually, this mindset consumes our lives and we are no longer able to deferientiate between what's counterfeit and what's really us.
I've found that since I've been trying to avoid stepping outside of God's ordained sanction for my body (through marriage) If I somehow slip and fall (no matter how BIG or small the sin) my emotional desire is heightening. Where as before, I could walk away from a situation of sorts with no second thought or desire; Now, not only do I feel the shame and guilt of sinning against God, but there is a PULL for emotional connection that was once surpressed.
Is it possible that God is removing the 'wall' or barrier that has guarded my true self and my true nature? Hebrews 4:7 says that when we hear the voice of God in our lives we should not harden our hearts to Him. "So God set another time for entering his rest, and that time is today. God announced this through David much later in the words already quoted: “Today when you hear his voice, don’t harden your hearts.”"
The more and more God is revealing to me about my purpose as a woman in Christ, the more and more the 'me' I thought I was is erased. The more I see how DANGEROUS it is as women for us to engage in casual sexual activity and emotional lust. What it does to our spirits and takes away from us is far too precious and far more valuable than.... dare I say....
the temporary feeling of bliss in a 2 minute orgasm (or multiple, hey who knows.) or...
an overnight 'cuddling' session with a man who WILL leave in the morning or...
sharing your body with a man God has NOT ordained for your life. Not only are you committing adultery on your husband to be, (because GOD has already PURPOSED YOUR LIFE! Romans 12:2, Jeremiah 29:11) you are partaking in it with a man who may be ordained for someone else's life.
I think as women of a higher standard we have to learn to LET THINGS GO. and allow God to break us down. My cousin told me the best thing I've heard in a while... "in order to have a break through, you have to be broken first."
It hurts, I dont want to be emotional. I dont want to have to avoid private dinners and intimate settings because Im becoming that woman who can be so easily wrapped up in the longing for a deeper connection with a man. But the truth is, as God brings you through, He breaks down some walls. And LORD knows, that was one of my highest... reinforced concrete and all.
Be Blessed!
I am not judging, believe me. Because I have been that girl. I have NEVER been one to assume or expect that because I have engaged in sexual activity with someone that love, a second date, or even a phone call should follow. Many times, I have played the heartbreaker. Engaging in one night, a few nights or a few weeks of casual and temperal pleasure; only to shut down any attempts by the other party to further the relationship beyond merely sex.
When the issues of, "Maybe we should get to know each other better (non sexually)" begin to arise, I haul tail! I'm being very transperent here.
I HAVE been that girl, with a million reasons why I'm not interested in moving past the casualty of fornication/adultery/pseudo-friendship. Claiming, "I'm like you! [to a man] I'm not really all emotional, I don't get women who get all wrapped up in sex and guys and they're in love after one night or just a few dates." Quote me. I've said it before believe me, it was probably a little harsher when said in real time. [ Hind's sight is 20/20, but that's neither here nor there ]
Anyway, this whole concept got me to thinking about the many women who claim to relate or connect to men in that sense.... I look at a woman's body and sexuality as being created to be submissive. Our sex is created to RECEIVE. Our reproductive system is created to NURTURE. Therefore, God must have equipped us as women with the natural patience, virtue and emotions necessary to be so SUBMISSIVE to both a MAN and a CHILD; on top of being submissive to GOD!
".... giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel..."1 Peter 3:7 (King James)
"....thy love to me was wonderful, passing the love of women." 2 Samuel 1:26 (King James)
and 1 Corinthians 11:8-9 (King James Version) "For the man is not of the woman: but the woman of the man. 9Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man."
First let me talk about why I found these scriptures very relatable.
1 Peter 3:7
In this scripture, women are acknowledged as being the 'weaker vessel'. Mainly in a physical sense, but I believe that when writing this letter Peter was also acknowledging the emotional tenderness of a woman in comparison to her male counterpart. Emotions are displays of the flesh. Therefore they hold relation to and are under the subjection of our vessels [flesh]. Further reading of the verse goes on to tell the husband to acknowledge that we are weaker vessels but equals in life.
2 Samuel 1:26
In this scripture David is in mourning for Saul and Johnathan. He writes that Johnathans love for him was great, surpassing even the love of women. I believe this again shows how the emotions of women are generally more intense and stronger than men. David was astounded and touched by the brotherly love they shared because the fact was this man showed him love deeply and truly the way women are known to love.
LASTLY,
1 Corinthians 11:8-9
Women were created FOR men. This is also evident in the story of the creation. Above all else women feel a need to be connected to men in some way deeper than men feel the need to be connected to us. It is the universal God given "purpose" of a woman. To be the help meet for a man. Just as man [humankind] is created with the purpose of worshipping and glorifying God.
DONT GET ME WRONG! I am not saying that God has placed us ALL here to be married and have husbands. I do NOT believe that is true, but what I am saying is due to the nature and reason of our creation, we tend to naturally desire what we were originally purposed for.
I say all this to say, what if our attempts to 'relate to' or 'connect with' men in regards to sexuality and emotions in relationships, supress a fear of disappointment, abandonment, rejection...etc? We deep inside long for the emotional love and long term commitment from a man, but have noticed how men can seemingly avoid heartbreak much easier than ourselves. Therefore in a self preservation attempt, we mimic (to be an imitation of; simulate; resemble closely. ) their aloofness, their casualty, there give love to get sex personas. Eventually, this mindset consumes our lives and we are no longer able to deferientiate between what's counterfeit and what's really us.
I've found that since I've been trying to avoid stepping outside of God's ordained sanction for my body (through marriage) If I somehow slip and fall (no matter how BIG or small the sin) my emotional desire is heightening. Where as before, I could walk away from a situation of sorts with no second thought or desire; Now, not only do I feel the shame and guilt of sinning against God, but there is a PULL for emotional connection that was once surpressed.
Is it possible that God is removing the 'wall' or barrier that has guarded my true self and my true nature? Hebrews 4:7 says that when we hear the voice of God in our lives we should not harden our hearts to Him. "So God set another time for entering his rest, and that time is today. God announced this through David much later in the words already quoted: “Today when you hear his voice, don’t harden your hearts.”"
The more and more God is revealing to me about my purpose as a woman in Christ, the more and more the 'me' I thought I was is erased. The more I see how DANGEROUS it is as women for us to engage in casual sexual activity and emotional lust. What it does to our spirits and takes away from us is far too precious and far more valuable than.... dare I say....
the temporary feeling of bliss in a 2 minute orgasm (or multiple, hey who knows.) or...
an overnight 'cuddling' session with a man who WILL leave in the morning or...
sharing your body with a man God has NOT ordained for your life. Not only are you committing adultery on your husband to be, (because GOD has already PURPOSED YOUR LIFE! Romans 12:2, Jeremiah 29:11) you are partaking in it with a man who may be ordained for someone else's life.
I think as women of a higher standard we have to learn to LET THINGS GO. and allow God to break us down. My cousin told me the best thing I've heard in a while... "in order to have a break through, you have to be broken first."
It hurts, I dont want to be emotional. I dont want to have to avoid private dinners and intimate settings because Im becoming that woman who can be so easily wrapped up in the longing for a deeper connection with a man. But the truth is, as God brings you through, He breaks down some walls. And LORD knows, that was one of my highest... reinforced concrete and all.
Be Blessed!
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